The girl you'll love to hate!

January. What better way to ring in the New Year than with a blogpost? :) It’s the first day of 2012 and my life and my plans flashed before my eyes. Yes, it’s possible to have a near-death flashback even when you’re not really dying.

I started my year like this… (partying, drinking, beach bumming)

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…and ended up like this: (PREGGERS!)

Don’t get me wrong. It’s not like I planned it, or anticipated it. It was really a shocker. So yeah, anti-climactic endings? The story of my life. A week after getting back from my “vacation” (more like hiatus), I had gone back to zero with M.

Nonetheless, I want to properly divide my life into the past, the present, and the future, and I’m trying so hard to categorize him as part of my past. I don’t want him to be the shadow always hanging over my head, haunting me every time I attempt to move on. I don’t want to hope and mope and whine and pine.

I don’t want to be hurt, because I am, still, and the fact that he didn’t do it on purpose doesn’t cancel it out. I don’t want to be in love with him anymore. Because I can deal with him being the one that got away —- at least that was his choice, his responsibility. But I won’t allow him to be the one who never left my mind because I never tried to forget.

It seemed everything unraveled at such a swift pace for the two of us; it makes no sense that I’m picking up the pieces in slow motion.

So GOODBYE 2011. You were awesome at first but in the end DROVE ME CRAZY! A horrible year for me, I must say, but I’m still grateful.

BRIGHTER. STRONGER. HAPPIER. Let’s just hope and pray for the best this 2012. Yes? YES!!

Happy New Year everyone! :)

XoXo